Adoptees often learn their adoption story through a combination of what their adoptive parents tell them, information from their agency and documents they receive as part of their adoption. This story is a narrative that shapes the way adoptees understand their identity, past traumatic events and history, and builds attachment between them and their adoptive family.
It is important to acknowledge your child’s birth family in the adoption story, even if you do not have much information about them. It is also important to acknowledge everyone else who was a part of the adoption process, from doctors and nurses to home study specialists and adoption agencies.
Many people find it helpful to include pictures in their adoption stories. This can be a fun project for parents and children alike, and it will help a child to visualize and connect with the different parts of their adoption story.
For younger children, less is often more in terms of adoption story content. Using only a few photos for each place or person can help children to better understand the story.
It is important to keep in mind that your child’s adoption story belongs to them. If you are unsure about what to include, consult with a professional to see how best to present the facts in an age-appropriate manner. It is also important to remember that it is never okay to share private details about your adoptee’s birth parents with others who are not part of the adoption triad.